09/01/2026
APOLOGIES
Y'all... I have some explaining to do. I reposted a post earlier under false pretenses, and I cannot continue to mislead you. I made a statement that was patently false, and I cannot leave it be, in good conscience....
As you may be aware, we have found a "diamond in the rough" type of artisan... a Copperfield-esqe, once in a lifetime master of her craft that makes it all look effortless and, each time, somehow outdoes herself doing something miraculous -- bordering on impossible. With such people, it's easy to trust the process and just put out content without doing one's due diligence. This is what happened earlier, and I have to make an important caveat to clear the record....
You see: when I had eluded to Miss Brenda "CRUSHING" it with her Mudslingers muffins, I was operating out of memory to an iteration in testing she gave us to try, weeks ago, NOT what we picked up today. What I tasted today, and what is currently available at the shop.... there's really no way to describe it except that it has completely ruined Chocolate Muffins for me π«
The flavor combos, the density, the mouthfeel, the visuals... nothing to this day has ever compared to this. Ask my wife: I went full feral for a moment and licked the crumbs out the package. I didn't even realize it: I was overwhelmed and operating on instinct. What I tasted wasn't "CRUSHING it," it was redefining what "it" is... and then casually dropping something that made that thing look like a tinker toy next to a particle accelerator. It's inconceivable.
Seriously: I know y'all expect better from me and, going forward, I will be more careful with my words. I am so sorry to any of you who already went and tried one, unprepared, based solely on my recommendation... to their loved ones: I'm sure they will regain full consciousness soon, just give them room to breathe and (if you value your fingers) keep your hands away from their mouth, and all should go back to normal before too long.
Be warned... these treats are not for the faint of heart or folks with weak constitution. We accept no responsibility for the aftermath -- consume at your own risk π€€
πππ (srsly, tho, they're flippin' delicious)