09/03/2026
Morning jibber jabber⌠sometimes you donât need saving. Sometimes you need a wrench.
Iâve been trying to balance what I share in these morning thoughts.
Is it too heavy? Have I been too serious lately? Should I find something funny today? Something lighter?
And then I realized that defeats the entire purpose.
I promised myself when I started doing this that whatever was rattling around in my brain, sitting heavy on my heart, making me laugh, making me think, or refusing to leave me alone at an ungodly hour of the morning⌠thatâs what I would write about.
Life isnât light every day.
And neither are we.
A few mornings ago, a friend called me.
Now, this particular friend and I text all the time. Funny stuff. TikToks. Random nonsense. The important things in life.
But when she calls, I know.
A phone call means I need to find myself somewhere soft and quiet because she needs to hear somebody on the other end.
She is an absolute spitfire. Full of energy. Always busy. Always volunteering. Always showing up. Always RSVPing yes.
And she genuinely loves a lot of it.
But I also know her well enough to know that sometimes all that movement fills a quiet space.
Because quiet is where depression likes to sneak in.
I answered.
âHey.â
Nothing.
I waited a second and finally said, âOkay, I need you to at least say hi so I know youâre there.â
âHi.â
Then nothing again.
So I told her, âOkay. Iâm going to sit right here and be quiet until youâre ready. We can sit here all damn day if thatâs what you need.â
And we did.
About a minute later she finally said it.
âI just canât do this today.â
âCanât do what?â
âI canât get out of bed.â
Then came the list.
Everything she needed to do. Everything she had agreed to do. Everything waiting for her outside that bedroom.
And I listened.
Because sometimes there isnât a magical sentence.
She already knew I loved her. Thatâs why she called me.
She knew I loved her enough that I would stop whatever I was doing and find a closet, bathroom, back room, underneath a damn bed if necessary, and sit there with her.
So she didnât need me to spend thirty minutes telling her how loved she was.
She needed something different.
I said, âOkay. Then donât get out of bed.â
Silence.
âCan you do a sit-up?â
She laughed a little.
âCan you stretch your arms?â
Yes.
âYour legs?â
Yes.
âCan you tell me a joke?â
And little by little, we stopped talking about getting out of bed.
We started talking about the thing she had signed herself up to do that day and absolutely did not want to do.
And somehow that turned into us imagining increasingly ridiculous ways she could show up.
âWhat if you wore THIS?â
âWhat if you walked in and said THIS?â
And pretty soon we were laughing.
Not polite laughing.
Stomach-hurts, canât-talk, completely-stupid laughing.
About thirty minutes into the conversation, I heard something in the background.
I know that sound.
I said, âAre you in the kitchen?â
She stopped.
And in the funniest little waitâŚwhat? voice she said,
âI am.â
âWell, that escalated quickly.â
đ
Then I heard the coffee maker.
âDid you actually put coffee in the filter?â
Pause.
âHold, please.â
She had not.
And there we went again.
Laughing.
She called me again later that day.
It wasnât suddenly a perfect day.
She wasnât magically 100%.
Depression doesnât disappear because somebody told a good joke.
But she got through the day.
She did the thing she had promised herself she would do.
And somewhere along the way, she even found a little joy in it.
Iâve thought about that phone call a lot.
We didnât knock the wall down.
We didnât fix everything behind it.
We just managed to put a crack in it long enough for a little light to get through.
And maybe thatâs something we should talk about more.
Everybody handles the hard days differently. What works for one person may do absolutely nothing for another.
But when you really know somebody, sometimes you know when they donât need another speech about how everything is going to be okay.
Sometimes they donât need saving.
Sometimes they just need someone willing to sit quietly on the other end of the phone until they can speak.
Sometimes they need somebody to make them laugh.
Sometimes they need somebody who knows the sound of their coffee pot.
Sometimes they need a wrench thrown into the gears of whatever their mind has convinced them they cannot do.
Because that morning she told me she couldnât get out of bed.
Thirty minutes later, she was standing in her kitchen making coffee.
GrantedâŚ
There was no coffee in the coffee maker.
But we can only perform one miracle at a time. â¤ď¸