Float Dreamery, 1255 E. Palmer Street, Philadelphia, PA (2026)

09/28/2024

And just like that, we’re wrapping up float early this season. Last weekend is Oct 12-13.

“Why though? Where are you going?” “What will I do?” “How will I live without you?” - LeAnn Rimes

Well, THATS NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINE…I’M GOING DOWN TO MIAMI TO HELP ONE OF MY BEST BUDS TO OPEN A RESTAURANT.

ANYYYYWAYS. YOU’LL HAVE TO SETTLE WITH YOUR STANDARD VEGAN SORBET OPTION OR WHATEVER THE HELL IS GOING ON OUT THERE.

AND WHATS WITH THE FLAVOR NAMES THESE OTHER BRANDS COME UP WITH? WHY DOES THE CREATIVITY STOP THERE? ITS EITHER THE MOST ON THE NOSE NAME (WHICH I UNDERSTAND) OR THE GOOFIEST STONER SLANG WRITTEN BY AI.

WHERES THE NUANCE? GIVE ME SWEET POETRY.

I WANT YOU DOUBLE CHECK THE NAME AND SAY WORDS OUT LOUD YOU’VE NEVER UTTERED BEFORE.

MACOOLY CONEKID
AUTUMNADDICT
PHILLY WONKA
CANADIAN KAIJU

I CAN DO THIS ALL DAY!

I THINK THATS EXACTLY WHY I STARTED FLOAT OVER 5 YEARS AGO.

I LOOKED AROUND AND WAS LIKE…”IS THIS THE BEST WE CAN DO?”

WE WANT TO BE INSPIRED AND COMPLACENCY IS THE DEATH OF CREATIVITY.

ANYWHOOOOO. I HOPE TO SEE ALL OF YOU IN THE COMING WEEKS.

OPEN THIS SUNDAY 11-3PM

C U SOON! SWING BY AND SAY HIiiii

07/05/2024

FLOAT DREAMERY IS ONLINE

PRETZELLA CRUSHING ALL THE NAYSAYERS AND YAYSAYERS ALIKE. IT JUST BE LIKE THAT SOMETIMES.

SALTED PRETZEL GELATO. CANDIED PECAN CRUNCHIES. LIL CHOCOLATE CHIPPIES! RUUUNNNNNNN!

TOWERING OVER TONGUES IN TERRIFIC TERROR, PRETZELLA STANDS TRIUMPHANTLY. AS BIG AS A SKYSCRAPER, BUT IS PACKED PERFECTLY IN A LIL PINT.

SALTY. SWEET. SIMPLE. SATURDAY. 11-3PM.

ALSO GATORADE WATER ICES RETURN TOMORROW. MAJOR YUMMERS.

SOMEONE MADE A DIET COKE BLUE GATORADE FLOAT LAST WEEKEND. INSANE. BUT….VERY GOOD. I COULDNT BELIEVE IT.

LIFE IS ABOUT TAKING THOSE CHANCES. RISKING IT FOR THE BISCUIT.

TAKE A CHANCE TOMORROW. STAY WEIRD. BE COOL.

OR DONT. YOUR LOSS. BYEEE.

05/31/2024

PINTS ARE ONLINE FOR SAAAAALE.

PICKUP SATURDAY 11-3PM.

REALLY DID IT THIS WEEK. I DONE DID IT.

THESE FLAVORS ARE STRONG, LOUD AND PROUD.

ALMOST AS LOUD AS THOSE NINJA BLENDERS.

ANYONE HAVE ONE OF THOSE? I WOULD HAVE LOVED TO BE IN THE ROOM WHILE THEY DECIDED ON THAT NAME.

“OK EVERYONE, WE HAVE A GREAT PRODUCT AT A REASONABLE PRICE POINT, NOW ALL WE NEED IS A NAME…”

“HOW ABOUT NINJA….” SOME PERSON SUGGESTS.

“YEAH, NINJA…” THEY SAY. “IT HAS MULTIPLE BLADES, ITS ALL BLACK AND SLEEK…”

“UH HUH….” THE CEO NODS, THEIR EYES LIGHTING UP

“AND ITS DEAFENING LOUD, YOU KNOW…LIKE NINJAS”

WHAT THE.

LAST TIME I TURNED ONE OF THOSE THINGS ON I HAD A RINGING IN MY EAR FOR 5 MINUTES.

LIKE SOMEONE SET OFF A FLASH BANG IN MY MOMS KITCHEN.

IM ALL DISORIENTED, SPINNING AROUND, LIKE THOSE PATENTED TINY NINJA LIKE BLADES, SLICING THROUGH FROZEN FRUITS WITH EASE AND PRECISION”

“WHERES THE OFF BUTTON!?” SHOUTS MY MOM

THE WHOLE ROOM IS A BLUR, AN ORCHESTRA OF CHAINSAW-LIKE SOUNDS FILL THE AIR.

“PULL THE PLUG!!!” MY MOM POINTS TO THE SUPER SLICK, JET BLACK CORD.

I GRAB THE CORD AND FREE IT OF ITS INSATIABLE CRAVING OF POWER AND SOUND.

“LOOKS LIKE MY SMOOTHIE IS GOOD TO GO” I YELLED FULL BLAST.

04/26/2024

PINTS ARE ONLINE.

PICKUP TOMORROW 11-3PM

ALL THIS AND MORE! FOR A LIMITED TIME ONLY.

KINDA LIKE THAT TIME OF THE DAY WHEN YOU’RE NOT SURE IF ITS GETTING BRIGHTER OR DARKER.

YOU’RE SITTING ON YOUR COUCH, THE SHADES ARE CRACKED OPEN AND THERES A STILLNESS IN THE AIR.

SO PEACEFUL. EVEN THE BIRDS ARE ON A SMOKE BREAK.

AND YOUR LITTLE JELLYBEAN EYES CLOSE, YOUR POST PIZZA NAP HAS JUST ARRIVED. FRESH DELIVERY.

JUST AS YOU SINK INTO THAT GENTLE MENTAL JACUZZI….

YOU HEAR WHAT SEEMS TO BE 100CC OF PURE WHOOPI CUSHION RIPPIN DOWN THE STREET.

SOME 15 YEAR OLD RYAN IS DOIN WHEELIES WHILE LIVE STREAMING, LIVING THAT MARIO KART LIFE.

WAKEY WAKEY, HERE WE GOOOOooo!

04/19/2024

THE SITE IS OPEN FOR ACTION. FAFO FLAVO.

LOTS OF OPTIONS. SOMETHING FOR EVERYONE. PICK UP ON SATURDAY 11AM - 3PM. WALK UPS ARE ALWAYS WELCOME.

ENCOURAGED EVEN. A SATURDAY ROUTINE. A “HEY, HOW YA DOIN? “ A 4/20 CELEBRATION. FOR ALL YOU CABBAGE PATCH KIDS.

I WILL BE THE RAINBOW AT THE END OF YOUR GOLDEN POT.

OR BEGINNING, AS YOU SURF THROUGH SATURDAY.

ITS ALL GOOOOOOOOD.

YOU KNOW WHATS NOT ALL GOOD? HOW POORLY BEANS ARE REPRESENTED IN RESTAURANTS.

WHY ISNT THERE A SPOT TO GET THOSE MAGICAL BEANS? COULD YOU IMAGINE?

I WANT TO WALK UP AND SNAG A PINT OF SOME FAT DELICIOUS BEANS WITH SOME FIXINS ON IT.

SOMEONE OPEN UP THAT SPOT.

COMMENT DOWN BELOW YOUR FAVORITE SPOT FOR BEANS. LETS GIVE IT UP FOR BEANS.

04/12/2024

ITS ON SITE. THE SITE IS LIVE. LIVE IT UP! PICKUP TOMORROW 12-4PM. YUMMAYYYY.

HOW WE DOING? ALL IS WELL? LISTENING TO LOTS OF SADE I HOPE.

WHEN I LISTEN TO SADE, I FEEL LIKE IM ON THIS HUGE FLOWING BEDSHEET, MADE OF THOSE CHOCOLATE RIBBONS FROM THE ORIGINAL W***Y WONKA MOVIE INTRO. MAYBE IN A CITY FURNITURE.

COULD YOU IMAGINE THAT MESS THOUGH? GLAD IT AINT MY ROOM!

SOUNDS LIKE A NIGHTMARE NOW THAT IM TYPING IT. A TRUE CHOCOLATE HELL. GET ME OUTTA THERE!

I WONDER WHAT SADE THINKS ABOUT?

03/29/2024

YOU EVER SEE SOMETHING THAT JUST STOPS YOU IN YOUR TRACKS?

LIKE, THIS IS YOU…”🚶🏻‍♀️…👀….👁️👄👁️”

FOR ME, ITS THIS PHOTO. I LOVE THE WAY THE LIGHT JUST DANCES OFF THIS GATORADE MONSTROSITY.

ANOTHER THING THAT STOPS ME IN MY TRACKS ARE THESE $150 PEPPER MILLS.

WHO IN THE HELL BUYS THESE THINGS? ITS A PEPPER MILL.

HERES SOME SALT FOR YA.

IVE HAD THE SAME PEPPER MILL FOR LIKE 10 YEARS. IT WAS $30, AND EVEN THEN I WAS LIKE “DANG THATS A LOT OF MONEY FOR A PEPPER MILL.”

I SHOULD GET INTO THE CHEF INFLUENCER WORLD. WHAT A LIFESTYLE.

“CHECK OUT THIS DOPE PEPPER MILL, ITS SHAPED LIKE CRASH BANDICOOT, AND IF YOU USE MY PROMO CODE YOU’LL GET 10% OFF!”

SIGN ME UP.

ALSO WE’RE OPEN SAT + SUN 11-3PM.

SNAG SOME PINTS FOR THIS WONDERFUL, PEPPER FILLED WEEKEND. ❤️

TAG YOUR RICH FRIEND WHO HAS THAT PEPPER MILL ❤️

03/09/2024

ONLINE SHOP IS OPEN FOR A TRIPLE PACK FOR $30.

PICKUP SUNDAY 11-3PM.

“IN THIS ECONOMY?” YOURE PROBABLY THINKING. WHATEVER THE HELL THAT MEANS.

A SWEET DEAL FOR AN EVEN SWEETER MEAL.

PICTURED IS SOME OF OUR PAST WORK. CAPTURED IN ITS MOST ATTRACTIVE/VOLATILE STATE.

AN AMORPHOUS GLOB OF GOODNESS, FROZEN IN TIME AND TEMPERATURE.

WOW. VERY COOL.

“I’LL HAVE ONE OF THOSE…” YOU PROBABLY JUST MUMBLED AS YOUR LITTLE FINGER POKED THE SCREEN.

NO. YOU’LL HAVE 3.

3 IS THE MAGIC NUMBER.

AND AMBER IS COLOR OF YOUR ENERGY.

WOAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhh…

02/23/2024

ONE OF THE FLAVORS OF ALL TIME.

CINNAMONEY - CINNAMON CAKE GELATO. PB RIPPLZ. (CONTAINS GLUTEN, NUTS AND SOY)

WE ALSO HAVE 7 OTHER FLAVORS, INCLUDING WACKY ROAD, MAPLE HAZE, STRAWBO, HYPER BIRTHDAY, GUAVY TRAIN, CHOCOLCK AND GLOBZILLA.

SHEESH!

WE OPEN SATURDAY AT 12 - 3PM. ENJOY A MOMENT OVER HERE AT THE FLOAT HEADQUARTERS.

SOUNDS LIKE A PLAN.
LOOKS AS GOOD AS IT SOUNDS.
TASTES AS GOOD AS IT LOOKS.
IS IT AS GOOD AS IT GETS?
GET IT TOMORROW AND SEE.

02/16/2024

WELL LOOK WHO IS ON YOUR FEED AGAIN, FEEDING YOU THE GOOD STUFF.

I HOPE Y’ALL HAVE BEEN WELL. IM SLOWLY RAMPING UP PRODUCTION, TINKERING AWAY, LISTENING TO LOTS OF WHITNEY HOUSTON.

THE FLAVOR POSTED IS

CHOCOLICK - DARK CHOCOLATE GELATO. SALTED CARAMEL RIBBONS. OREO COOKIES WITH LIL CHOCOLATE CHIPPIES. (CONTAINS SOY, GLUTEN FREE AND NUT FREE)

A CLASSIC. A FLAVORITE. A WINNER. A NO BRAINER. A BRAIN FREEZER. A FROZEN SWEET SLUDGEHAMMER OF GOODNESS RIGHT TO THE TONGUE. POW. BANG. KO. YOU OK? NO, YOURE NOT. YOU DONT HAVE THIS PINT. GET OK.

GET GOOD.

WE OPEN AT 3PM.

WE ALSO HAVE…

MAPLE HAZE - MAPLE GELATO. NOTELLA SWIRLS. (CONTAINS HAZELNUTS AND SOY, GLUTEN FREE)

MORE MADNESS SOON. SEE YALL L8R. 🥶

12/03/2023

FLOAT IS WRAPPING IT UP FOR THE SEASON.

OPENING TOMORROW 12-3PM FOR SOME LAST MINUTE YUMMERZ.

ADDED A PINT PACK ON THE SITE.

4 RANDOM PINTS FOR THE PRICE OF 3. WOW.

YOU KEEP BEING LIKE “OMG, IM SO RANDOM!”

PROVE IT BECKY.

YOU CAN ALSO WALK UP AND SNAG A PINT OR A SCOOP. VERY COOL.

SWING BY AND SAY BYE!

WE’LL BE BACK BEFORE YOU KNOW IT 🫠

C U SOOOOON ❤️

11/10/2023

PINT PREORDER IS OPEN. PICKUP SUNDAY 12-3PM

CINNAMOATS - SALTED CINNAMON OAT GELATO. FUDGE RIPZ. CANDIED BOURBON PECANS. LIL CHOCOLATE SPECS. (CONTAINS SOY AND NUTS, GLUTEN FREE)

WE BACK AT IT AGAIN THIS SUNDAY. ALWAYS WITH THE WHITE VANS.

THIS PINT PACK A WOLLOP. MADE WITH CARE. NOT JUST A HODGEPODGE OF STUFF, OK?

A CAREFULLY CURATED EXPLORATION INTO THE DEPTHS OF FLAVOR. PULLING FROM REAL LIFE EXPERIENCES WITH BOWLS OF OATMEAL FOR BREAKFAST IN THE MORNING.

WHAT A FASCINATING STORY. VERY COOL.

TASTES LIKE BREAKFAST EXPLODING OUT OF A TOY CANNON.

SIDE NOTE, I LOVE THE VEGAN INFLUENCERS THAT WALK AROUND GROCERY STORES AND ARE LIKE “10 THINGS YOU DIDNT KNOW WERE VEGAN.”

FIRST ONE THAT WAS SHOWN WAS THIS CAKE MIX, I WAS LIKE, “OK, COOL…DIDNT KNOW…”

THEN THEY SHOWED OLIVE OIL AND I WAS LIKE “ 🫨😵…GOOD TO KNOW”

AFTER THAT IT WAS SOME OVERPRICED KETCHUP AND I WAS THEN LIKE “OK, ITS RED…MAYBE PEOPLE THINK ITS NOT VEGAN…”

AND THAT GOT ME THINKING…

“I BETTER SEE MUSTARD ON THIS DAMN LIST.”

Float Dreamery

09/28/2024

07/05/2024

05/31/2024

04/26/2024

04/19/2024

04/12/2024

03/29/2024

03/09/2024

02/23/2024

02/16/2024

12/03/2023

11/10/2023

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