02/07/2026
🏈🇵🇷 THE BENITO BOWL IS TOMORROW 🇵🇷🏈
Here’s what’s happening.
Our flag is on the biggest stage in the world.
T**i Lola says the lyrics are “unsavory.”
Thirty seconds later she’s perreando while pretending she’s not.
Aunt Karen asks why it’s in Spanish,
starts mashing buttons, tries to turn SAP off,
changes the channel, sees what’s on “the other channel,”
gets mortified, quietly switches it back, and suddenly her hips begin to wiggle.
And this is the part everyone misses.
Nobody leaves.
Nobody changes the channel.
The game keeps playing.
The music stays loud.
The kitchen turns into a dance floor.
That’s it.
Not politics.
Not fashion debates.
Not lyric think pieces.
Just pride for a beautiful flag on the largest stage there is.
So here’s the move.
Eat first.
Watch football.
Dance anyway.
Be proud.
Before kickoff, handle the food.
🥟 Order Koki empanadas in bulk.
Enough for everyone in the room, including the loud ones.
