Mr. Dogs

09/14/2026

GOOD DOG: We need to discuss Mom and Dad’s dinner in Peru.

BAD DOG: What did they do now?

GOOD DOG: They ate pachamanca.

BAD DOG: They ate a what-a-manca?

GOOD DOG: Pachamanca.

BAD DOG: Is that a fish? A dance? A prescription medication?

GOOD DOG: It’s a traditional Peruvian meal. They heat stones, place them in a hole in the ground, layer in meat, corn, potatoes and vegetables, then cover everything and let it cook underground.

BAD DOG: Dirt sous vide.

GOOD DOG: It is not dirt sous vide. It’s an ancient Andean cooking tradition.

BAD DOG: Fancy dirt sous vide.

GOOD DOG: They cooked lamb, chicken and guinea pig.

BAD DOG: Hold on. Guinea pig made the guest list?

GOOD DOG: Guinea pig was the guest of honor.

BAD DOG: And Mom and Dad ate it?

GOOD DOG: They ate everything. The lamb. The chicken. The guinea pig. Giant Peruvian corn. Potatoes. And several vegetables they couldn’t pronounce before or after eating them.

BAD DOG: That’s impressive. They usually need three meetings just to agree on pizza toppings.

GOOD DOG: It seems all it takes is burying dinner underground for an hour to eliminate their remaining hesitation.

BAD DOG: I respect that. New country, new culture, mysterious dirt feast—grab a fork and start making decisions.

GOOD DOG: They tried every single thing placed in front of them.

BAD DOG: As they should. You don’t travel all the way to Peru to order chicken strips.

GOOD DOG: For once, we agree. It was bold, adventurous and completely outside anything they would normally experience at home.

BAD DOG: And excellent research.

GOOD DOG: Research for what?

BAD DOG: Nothing.

GOOD DOG: Why did you say “nothing” like you already know something?

BAD DOG: Let’s just wait and see what flavors Mom and Dad bring home for a Peruvian Dog.

GOOD DOG: There is no Peruvian Dog.

BAD DOG: Not yet.

09/07/2026

Mr. Dog landed in Puerto Maldonado

09/07/2026

pisco sour

09/06/2026

09/06/2026

Mr. Survival: “I told you we needed emergency supplies.”

Mr. Good Dog: “It’s just Mountain Dew.”

Mr. Bad Dog: “JUST Mountain Dew?! One of our owners apparently traveled all the way to Peru without first confirming that Peru has Mountain Dew. Amateur hour.”

So naturally, we’ve established a highly classified emergency stash. 🤫🥤🌎 Because when civilization collapses, the dogs will be prepared… and one owner will finally learn to plan ahead

09/05/2026

MR. GOOD DOG: GOOD MORNING! 🐶 We have cinnamon rolls!

MR. BAD DOG: And caramel rolls.

MR. GOOD DOG: Fresh. Warm. Gooey. Delicious.

MR. BAD DOG: Basically everything you need to ruin every other breakfast for the rest of your life.

MR. GOOD DOG: That sounds positive.

MR. BAD DOG: It is. Try to keep up.

MR. GOOD DOG: You should tell everyone to come early!

MR. BAD DOG: Yes. Come early.

MR. GOOD DOG: Because we love seeing everyone?

MR. BAD DOG: That too. But mostly because some of you wait until 11:47, stroll in like royalty, and then act personally betrayed when the cinnamon rolls are gone.

MR. GOOD DOG: We don’t want anyone to miss out.

MR. BAD DOG: Then stop sleeping through breakfast.

MR. GOOD DOG: What about the caramel rolls?

MR. BAD DOG: Loaded with pecans. Covered in caramel. Completely unreasonable.

MR. GOOD DOG: Unreasonable?

MR. BAD DOG: You will eat one and immediately start calculating how many you can take home without your family noticing.

MR. GOOD DOG: That seems sneaky.

MR. BAD DOG: That’s why they call me Bad Dog.

MR. GOOD DOG: So… come see us this morning?

MR. BAD DOG: Yes. Come early. Buy a cinnamon roll. Buy a caramel roll. Make excellent decisions for once.

08/29/2026

Mr. Good Dog: I’m starting to think management has lost all adult supervision.

Mr. Bad Dog: Starting to?

Good Dog: We used to sell hot dogs. Nice hot dogs. Understandable hot dogs.

Bad Dog: Boring hot dogs.

Good Dog: Then somebody walked in and said, “What if the bun itself tasted like a steak?”

Bad Dog: That would be the Bluey.

Good Dog: Montreal steak-seasoned bun. Buttered. Toasted. Bacon. Onion jam. Blue cheese dressing. Blue cheese crumbles. Crispy onions.

Bad Dog: You forgot the all-beef dog.

Good Dog: I was distracted by the fact that the bun has its own seasoning program.

Bad Dog: Admit it. You want one.

Good Dog: I’m concerned about it.

Bad Dog: That wasn’t the question.

Good Dog: …yes.

Bad Dog: Thank you.

Good Dog: And then management apparently looked at that and thought, “Still too reasonable.”

Bad Dog: Enter the F5 Tornado Dog.

Good Dog: Everything-seasoned bun. Schmear. Onion jam. Pickle spear. Jalapeños. Onions. Crispy fried onions. Mustard.

Bad Dog: It has multiple forms of onion.

Good Dog: Why does a hot dog need multiple forms of onion?

Bad Dog: Same reason a tornado needs multiple pieces of your neighbor’s patio furniture.

Good Dog: That is not comforting.

Bad Dog: It’s not supposed to be comforting. It’s an F5.

Good Dog: I just want to know where the approval process is.

Bad Dog: There isn’t one.

Good Dog: Recipe testing?

Bad Dog: Nope.

Good Dog: Committee?

Bad Dog: Absolutely not.

Good Dog: So management just wakes up and says, “Today we weaponize lunch”?

Bad Dog: Pretty much.

Good Dog: I hate how excited I am about this.

Bad Dog: That’s the spirit.

Good Dog: I still think we should establish some boundaries.

Bad Dog: Sure.

Good Dog: Really?

Bad Dog: No. Management has carte blanche.

Good Dog: We’re doomed.

Bad Dog: Yeah.

Good Dog: …save me a Bluey.

Bad Dog: And an F5?

Good Dog: Don’t push it.

Bad Dog: I’ll make you both.

08/29/2026

🌧️ YEP. IT’S RAINING. WE’RE BAKING ANYWAY. 🌧️

Looks like rain for the better part of the morning, but Mr. Dogs opens at 8:00 AM with:

🐶 Cinnamon Rolls
🐶 Caramel Rolls
🐶 Caramel Rolls with Nuts

And you can top yours with:
🍎 Apple
🫐 Blueberry
🍒 Cherry

Don’t worry about standing outside in the rain. We’ve got an area just inside the main door where you can get out of the weather while you wait.

So throw on something waterproof, make the run, and come get something warm, gooey and completely inappropriate for breakfast.

Rain or shine — 8:00 AM at Mr. Dogs

08/28/2026

GOOD DOG: Bad Dog.

BAD DOG: Good Dog.

GOOD DOG: Why are there new buns?

BAD DOG: New buns?

GOOD DOG: Don’t do that.

There is a Parmesan bun back there.

BAD DOG: Huh.

GOOD DOG: We don’t have a Parmesan hot dog.

BAD DOG: Correct.

GOOD DOG: Then there’s another bun covered in what appears to be everything bagel seasoning.

BAD DOG: Very observant.

GOOD DOG: We don’t have an everything bagel hot dog either.

BAD DOG: Also correct.

GOOD DOG: AND NOW THERE’S A BUN COVERED IN MONTREAL STEAK SEASONING.

BAD DOG: That one’s pretty, isn’t it?

GOOD DOG: WHAT IS MANAGEMENT DOING?

BAD DOG: I’ve been told not to discuss ongoing bun operations.

GOOD DOG: “Bun operations?”

BAD DOG: Classified.

GOOD DOG: So we have three brand-new buns, no corresponding hot dogs, and nobody is going to explain anything?

BAD DOG: I think you understand the situation perfectly.

GOOD DOG: Are we at least telling people when they can find out?

BAD DOG: Oh, absolutely.

Come to Mr. Dogs.

See the buns.

Ask questions.

Make poor financial decisions involving hot dogs.

GOOD DOG: You could just tell them what we’re making.

BAD DOG: Where’s the fun in that?

Something new is coming to Mr. Dogs.

Actually…

three somethings.

And judging by the buns alone, things may have gotten slightly out of hand.