06/23/2026
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****BREAKING NEWS FROM GATLINBURG****
"Short Green Umbrella Feels Inadequate At Popular Local Pub"
-Gatlinburg, TN
A short green table umbrella, which is a new arrival at a popular Gatlinburg Pub, apparently feels inadequate and that it can't perform its duties as well as the other umbrellas.
Green Umbrella, as people call it, just seems sad and down all of the time according to locals.
"The red umbrellas attract bigger groups of people to get under them. They just have more appeal than the shorter green one" one local said.
Others have tried to convince the shorter green Umbrella that it will be ok, and yes, when it rains people get soaked under it. But they tell him it's not a "bad thing."
"Some people enjoy playing in the rain" one woman said.
Next time you are in Gatlinburg give the green Umbrella a try.