09/04/2026
Your identity is safe with me. 🤭
Dearest Citizens,
I ventured onto post for 2 job interviews. Neither resulted in gainful employment, but Noffy Coffee did provide caffeine, so the mission was not a complete failure.
I hadn’t planned to review anything. I was simply meeting a dear friend between interviews when I wandered into a pleasant, impressively organized coffee shop tucked inside a historic building— which immediately earned points from the part of me that enjoys old buildings nearly as much as I enjoy local nonsense. The staff were also exceptionally kind.
Their sugar-free selection was a little slim, but fortunately, your dearest Lady does not leave the house unarmed.
I was caught red-handed emptying a suspicious little Ziploc baggie into my drink. Before anyone alerts the MPs, it contained exactly 1 tablespoon of cocoa powder, sugar substitute, and a dot of vanilla extract.
Some women carry emergency lipstick. I carry emergency coffee enhancements. We all prepare for battle differently.
My companion and I were also encouraged to take a photo and add it to the wall. A very sweet idea— but respectfully, absolutely not.
It is rather difficult to operate as an anonymous local menace after voluntarily hanging your own wanted poster inside a coffee shop.
That brings me to a gentle request for Noffy… If security cameras captured my tiny baggie operation and visit, please protect the identities of Lady Junction and her innocent companion. She merely agreed to have coffee with me. She did not consent to entering the JC witness-protection program.
After receiving a wee bit of unauthorized flavor treatment from yours truly, the drip coffee was delicious.
Historic charm, pleasant atmosphere, kind staff, and enough organization to make the rest of us look bad. Noffy Coffee gets a solid 10/10 recommendation if you’re on post.
Just bring your own sugar-free contraband if you’re touched with the pre-‘diabeeeeetus’ like me.
— Lady Junction ❤️❤️💋
TLDR:👀 I stopped at Noffy Coffee between 2 unsuccessful job interviews and accidentally discovered a lovely, organized coffee shop with kind staff and plenty of historic charm. The sugar-free selection was limited, but my emergency Ziploc baggie saved the day. After some personal doctoring, the coffee was delicious. 10/10 recommend.
Gen Z/A TLDR: 💅Jobs said no. Coffee said yes. The baggie looked sus, the drink was bussin’, and the face reveal was respectfully declined. 10/10. No notes— except maybe more sugar-free flavors.
