09/06/2026
âTwas the Night Before the Donnie Open âłđ„
âTwas the night before the Donnie Open, and all through the Landmark,
The Yukon was flowing, and things were getting dark.
The golf bags were loaded, the coolers packed tight,
For Lake Windsor awaited at first morning light.
The golfers were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of birdies danced in their heads.
Well⊠some dreamed of birdies, some dreamed of par,
And some just hoped they could make it from the tee to the bar.
Tamra was working, as everyone knew,
Doing the work of roughly twenty-two.
The teams were all set, the prizes prepared,
While everyone else drank Yukon and barely even cared.
The Landmark was buzzing, the stories grew tall,
Of drives down the middle that never happened at all.
âTomorrowâs my year!â could be heard through the room,
From a guy whoâd be drinking Yukon before breakfast at noon.
Then morning would come with a glorious sight,
Lake Windsor Golf Club bathed in sunlight.
The carts would be lined up, the golfers would cheer,
And somebody would crack open the first Yukon of the year.
Thereâd be slices and shanks and mulligans galore,
Lost balls by the dozenâand then probably more.
Some scores would be questionable, some outright lies,
And at least one golf cart would meet its demise.
Because this isnât the Masters.
Thereâs no green jacket in sight.
Itâs the DONNIE OPEN, dammitâ
And weâre doing it right.
Itâs friends, itâs family, itâs Yukon and golf,
Itâs laughing so hard you can barely tee off.
Itâs a beautiful s**t show from beginning to end,
All to honor Donnie, surrounded by friends.
So raise up your Yukon and give out a cheer,
To Donnie, the reason we all gather here.
To Tamra, the woman who somehow pulls it together,
And to the Landmark for hosting this madness forever.
Now fill up your coolers and get some damn sleep,
Because promises of âtaking it easyâ nobody will keep.
And I heard someone yell as they stumbled from sight:
âHAPPY DONNIE OPEN TO ALLâ
AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!â âłđ„đ»