01/05/2026
At 40, I Feel Genuinely Happy
This birthday cake was made for a little girl.
After I finished the fondant figurine, my daughter looked at it and said, “Mom, every little girl you make looks like you.”Then she braided my hair into two plaits, exactly like the little girl on the cake.
As I approach forty, the biggest realization is actually about letting go. Not that I’ve become less responsible, but I’m no longer driven by external standards. For example, I don’t really care about job titles anymore, nor do I measure my life by a career ladder I’m supposed to climb. What matters more to me is whether I’m doing something I truly enjoy, and whether I’m doing it with people I like and trust.
What we often call resilience is, in fact, a mindset of “the worst isn’t that bad.”Many things that feel overwhelming or insurmountable in the moment, a few years later, turn out to be insignificant. With this kind of low-pressure mindset, waking up in the morning comes with a very tangible sense of happiness. I can clearly feel the care and support from people around me, and I’m more willing to pass that love on.
Today, I learned a Dutch word from my business partner: gunfactor. Roughly speaking, it means being someone others naturally want to support, to see succeed, and to be close to. I accepted this affirmation calmly, because I know it’s not a skill, it’s something that has been built, little by little, over the years.
This morning, as soon as I woke up, I called a close friend to ask her to help me think through the business model of a new project. I rely a lot on intuition, but at critical moments, I value even more the ability to find trusted people within a day, think things through together, and then make decisions with clarity.
I will turn 40 at the end of this year.
I feel fortunate, age has brought a certain clarity, but it hasn’t left too many marks on me yet. Perhaps the ability to continuously feel happiness is, in itself, a kind of force that keeps one from aging too quickly.
