You can ask us to make a lasagna and we will sell it to you, but you can't eat it here as we are strictly take-away. Please let us now in advance as well (322) 189 8866 (order by calling or sending a message). So now that all the technical stuff is out of the way: One of our slaves starts out by buying everything in the local grocery market and at the butcher across the street, then an underpaid employee washes everything (it has to be clean so better scrub everything 3 times). Now our chef from some obscure european country starts by chopping the tomatoes in pieces and gently tossing them into a perfectly heated pot, here they simmer at low heat for about an hour. Then the celery and the carrots gets chopped with a somewhat sharp knife and dumped into the tomatoes in the most nonchalant way possible, it keeps simmering until the chef is bored watching youtube (usually 1-2 hours). Whatever wine is left after the previous nights debauchery gets added to the sauce and reduced to a thick sauce. Now a bunch of bacon pieces gets thrown into a HOT pot (one of those you always read about with a heavy bottom) and the bacon gets crunchy, bacon fat gets upcycled in the sauce, no waste here!. Then some tiny pieces of cow and pig gets added to the pot too, slowly so it gets darkened and not overwhelmed by the moisture in the meat. You know when you add a pound of ground beef in a pot and after 5 minutes it's boiling in it's own water, well we don't do that, we add the meat slowly over about 20-30 minutes so the meat has some flavour and gets browned. Sauce and meat gets introduced and put on a low heat until somebody bothers to wake up from his nap. Now the most experienced employee takes a stick of butter, some flour and a liter of milk (it's like 4 cups to you guys that feel more comfortable with the imperial units) and by magic makes it thick and creamy and starts to call the mixture "béchamel" and everybody laughs. Next a glass filled a little bit over the middle with normal flour gets mixed with the same amount of not-normal flour and usually 3 eggs and a bit of olive oil gets incorporated into the flour, it has to be kneaded for as long as the chef can be bothered (usually not long in this climate) and left in the fridge for about 1 hour. Lastly, the dough gets crushed and stretched again and again until it's uniform and smooth, to help with this torture we have a shiny machine with a hand crank that make the dough the exact right thickness and the pasta gets boiled for a short amount of time. Finally everything gets added together in layers in a big pan, usually about 5 layers and topped off with cheese, and everybody loves cheese so we never forgets to add the cheese. Baked for 20-30 minutes and, unless we drop it on the floor, eaten within a few hours. A whole lasagna serves about 8 adult men/women or one lonely person for 2-3 days. We can also sell pieces but you will want to eat the whole thing.
