22/08/2026
🚨 LOCAL CHEF HAILED A HERO AFTER ‘CAT IN THE HAT’ DRAMA ON BELMONT ROAD
Residents in Belmont have been left stunned after discovering they may have a local hero in their midst, following the latest bizarre sighting of the so-called “Cat in the Hat” that has reportedly been harassing neighbourhoods and frightening children across Belfast.
The mysterious figure’s reign of terror appears to have come to an abrupt end on Belmont Road, after one brave chef from Sixty Nine decided enough was enough and took matters into his own hands.
One eyewitness, Betsy Lamont, told Belfast Live she watched the extraordinary scenes unfold.
“Well, I was walking home from my friend Delores’ house, you see, and I nearly jumped out of my skin when I saw the menace in a mask standing outside that crude burger joint on Belmont Road.
“I immediately snapped a photo, and before I knew it, the chef pulled the cat inside and slammed the door.
“Then I heard someone shout, ‘YOU’RE GETTING THE BEST MEAT ON THE ROAD, FINISHING WITH MY SPECIAL SAUCE YA ROCKET YE!’ followed by what I can only describe as a cat screaming.
“About 20 minutes later, the cat walked back out like John Wayne, carrying a burger and smoking a cigarette.”
It remains unclear exactly what took place during those 20 minutes.
Frankly, some questions are better left unanswered.
The Cat in the Hat has not been seen terrorising Belmont Road since.
Sixty Nine declined to comment, presumably because the chef was busy.
