12/05/2025
Jemima "Jem"..... '95-14' A British Bull terrier X Kelpie/Dingo/Heeler mongrel. Super intelligent, loyal, quick to learn, with ZERO genetic purebreed problems, she still is the best $25 i ever spent. A legend to many in her lifetime even before she crossed over, She's still a legend today around some firepits.
She schooled many young farmyard know-it-all experts over the years when the words "I'll show you how to treat a dog" led directly to bloodied ankles and bruised ego's. "Scream and Cry Blue Murder son, but I told ya not to. Try it again and this time i'll be the one doing the biting". Jem was a faithful one master dog -fiercely loyal and protective - and i was a one dog man, equally loyal and protective. We were a good team and Jem was the best possible partner a bloke could have when trouble came knocking.
At one stage had a serious girlfriend of 5yrs wanting to share an inner city highrise apartment, wedding bells on the horizon. Couldn't stand me wasting money renting a grungy house with a yard for the dog instead of a flash new apartment with a big screen tv and city views for her and demanded i choose assuming i'd ditch the dog without a thought. "You got 3 seconds" she said. "I'm not gonna let my life be ruled by a useless bitch now am i?" i said as she smiled "Finally! I've wanted that dog gone from day 1" she slipped. "Righto then," says I "I'll be off. See you round Charlie Brown." Her jaw hit the floor! With a sly wink and a 'mwah' i strut down the hall and out the door in completely satisfying silence. Jem was happy, she never really liked that bitch anyway and her instincts were always spot on.
If Jem did like you, it was instant bff's. If she didn't like you, you wouldn't get past the door. A medium size dog of barely 20kg most people thought she was harmless, a very VERY big mistake. She was utterly fearless (except with cats lol) and highly aggressive when provoked. So that over a 19 year span of Cheap Melbourne rentals she shut down so many burglary attempts she was the ONE AND ONLY reason i never got robbed. All i ever found were the odd chewed boots, trouser legs and alarmingly heavy blood trails across the yard and over the fence - and all over the dog. Never her blood lol.
Above all else though she was unstoppable with a Soccer ball! She could header 10+times free or rebounding and showed amazing precision and control when dribbling, passing and shooting. She once snuck on ground during an Essendon Royals S.C. match and for a good 15-20 minutes successfully kept the ball from all 22 players til i got the lead on her. She was so damn good it was impossible for anyone to be upset with the crowd madly cheering her on too. If Tik Tok was around 20yrs ago she would have been a viral sensation with millions of followers. I've seen some tricksy dogs since then but none of them has ever come close to Jem with a soccer ball.
Had a few false alarms and unnecessary check ups, but the one and only time she ever really required vet treatment was when she was diagnosed with kidney failure at 19yrs and the (name witheld)Vet tried to swindle me into a 4 day stay on a $500 a day S/C Saline drip that you could buy online for $30 and do at home with zero training. Even then she didn't need the vet as there was nothing to be done, the saline drip only briefly delayed the inevitable. I took her home, kept her as comfortable as i could and when the time came i took her to the good folks at Maribyrnong Vet clinic and held her tight in my arms as she crossed over. I still remember her eyes locked on mine as the light faded from them. Still very much loved and missed. Vale Jem.
