Adelaide River Inn Tourist Park

09/10/2026

09/10/2026

OZ PIE SPECIAL! 🇦🇺

If your idea of fine dining involves a proper steak pie, a mountain of mash and enough gravy to need a snorkel, we've got your weekend sorted!

For just $19, you'll score:

🥧 Steak Pie
🥔 Creamy Mash
🫛 Peas
🧅 Rich Onion Gravy
🍺 ###X Midi or Soft Drink

📅 Available Friday 9th & Saturday 10th October

Whether you're fresh off the road, knocking off work, or just chasing a feed that'll stick to your ribs, the Oz Pie Special is ready and waiting.

📍 303 Bar & Bistro, Adelaide River

No kale. No tiny portions. No nonsense. Just a proper Aussie pub feed.

07/10/2026

A copper pulls over a bloke for speeding.

"Mate, I clocked you doing 130 km/h in an 100 zone."

The driver replies, "Nah, officer, I had the cruise control set on 100. Must be something wrong with your radar gun."

Without looking up from her knitting, the wife says,

"Don't be ridiculous, love. This ute doesn't have cruise control."

The copper starts writing out the ticket.

The bloke glares at his wife and mutters,

"Would you mind keeping your mouth shut for once?"

The wife smiles and says,

"Well, you should be grateful your radar detector went off when it did, otherwise you'd have been going even faster."

The officer sighs and starts writing a second ticket for the illegal radar detector.

The bloke turns red.

"Seriously, woman, can you just be quiet?"

The officer then notices the driver's seat belt.

"And I see you're not wearing your seat belt either, mate. That's another fine."

The driver quickly replies,

"I had it on, officer. Took it off when you pulled me over so I could get my licence out."

The wife chimes in again.

"Oh, come off it, dear. You never wear your seat belt."

Now the officer starts writing a third ticket.

The bloke snaps,

"WILL YOU PLEASE SHUT UP?!"

The officer looks over at the wife and asks,

"Does your husband always talk to you like that, ma'am?"

The wife replies:

"Only when he's had a few b**rs." 🍺😆

05/10/2026

Aunty Sarah was in her 80s and had spent her entire life on the family cattle station, miles outside a small bush town.

One year, she travelled to Melbourne to visit her niece and husband, who lived in one of those posh suburbs where the grass is greener than a wet season paddock.

Just down the road was a famous golf course.

On her second afternoon, Aunty Sarah decided to go for a wander.

When she got back, her niece asked,

"How was your walk, Aunty?"

"Oh, lovely, dear," replied Aunty Sarah.

"I found some beautiful green paddocks. There were quite a few blokes spread out across them. Every now and then one would start yelling at me, but I couldn't make out what all the fuss was about."

"Then four fellas followed me around for ages, waving their arms and carrying on like they were trying to yard a rogue bull."

"Whatever for?" asked her niece.

"No idea," said Aunty Sarah. "Strange bunch."

Then she placed a large shopping bag on the kitchen table.

"Mind you, I did find all these little white balls lying around. Thought they might come in handy, so I picked them up."

Her niece looked inside and nearly fell off her chair.

"AUNTY SARAH! They're golf balls!"

Aunty Sarah's eyes widened.

"Well, that explains it!"

"Explains what?"

"Those four blokes spent the whole afternoon chasing me around the paddock yelling 'FORE!'"

She paused for a moment.

"Mind you, I still don't know who the other three were."

05/10/2026

Congratulations to Michael Herbert who Jagged our Joker prize tonight $1265 🍻

04/10/2026

Treat yourself to the famous Sunday Roast Chicken at 303 Bar & Bistro, Adelaide River.

Herb-roasted chicken served with crispy roast potatoes, seasonal vegetables, braised red cabbage, golden Yorkshire pudding, and rich house-made gravy for just $24.

The only question is... extra gravy or extra gravy?